5 Tips For a Successful Conversation About Long-Term Care

Starting a conversation about long-term care with your aging loved one can be uncomfortable. As a result, you may be tempted to put it off until tomorrow. But far too often, tomorrow never comes and before you know it – it’s too late. But given that at least 70 percent of people over 65 years old will require some form of assistance in their lifetime, a conversation about long-term care is one we should all be having. That being said, here are 5 tips to help you initiate, approach, and end a productive conversation about long-term care with your aging loved one.

1. Do your homework.

Before you attempt to talk to your loved one about long-term care, make sure you do your homework. Identify all of your concerns and write them down. Doing so will give you a reference point for the other half of your homework assignment: educate yourself.

Educating yourself includes exploring the different solutions for each of the concerns you wrote down. Gather resources you think will help you gain a deeper understanding of your options.

Here are a few of the benefits you will attain from doing your homework.

You’ll be more confident when discussing the options. 

You increase your chances of selecting the best possible outcome for your loved one’s individual needs. 

Your loved one will view you as a trusted source.

They may even come to you with their questions because they feel confident you will be able to provide them with answers.

2. Take advantage of every opportunity.

Taking advantage of every opportunity is a way to have the conversation without having to be the one to bring it up. This indirect approach is particularly useful if the topic is sensitive. Be aware that this method does not take the place of having the conversation; it is more about planting the seed for further conversation.

To clarify, here are a few scenarios where this is appropriate.

Someone brings up a senior care related topic. The next time someone brings up a topic relating to senior care while you and your loved one are present, make it a point to ask your loved one’s opinion.

News. The same principle applies to long-term care related topics in the news. The next time you hear/read about senior topics, ask for your loved one to provide some commentary on the topic. A few topics to be aware of include changes in the retirement age, health care policy changes, senior living, etc.

Taking advantage of every opportunity gives you a chance to ease into the conversation in preparation for a more in-depth discussion.

3. Approach with empathy.

Approaching the topic with empathy is about making an effort to understand your loved one. No one wants you to feel sorry for them; seniors are no different.

Empathy does not come easy for everyone.  Here are a few things you can say to show you care.

• “You’re very special to me.”
• “I worry that something may happen to you when you…”
• “I’ve been thinking about you lately.”
• “I love you and I want you to be happy.”

These phrases may help you find the right words to use, but it’s equally important to pay attention to how you say them. And always remember to listen to their response.

[Tweet “Always remember to listen.”]

4. Be their partner, not their parent.

It is important to remember, you are their partner – not their parent. Nobody likes being told what to do, so don’t approach them with a pre-determined plan. Making important decisions about their lives prior to consulting with them will hardly ever go over well regardless of how good your intentions are. Doing so could place an unnecessary strain on your relationship and cause them to feel resentful towards you. Everyone, including your loved one has the inherent right to maintain control of their lives.

 [Tweet “Caring Conversation Tip: You are their partner- not their parent.”]

You and your loved one should work together. This means you will need to listen to what they want. You won’t agree on everything, but you need to remember it is their life you a dealing with.

If you want them to include you in their planning process, you should constantly emphasize they have the final say and ensure them you are only there to help. Your relationship should come before anything else.

5. Give them time to think.

Give your loved one time to think after the conversation. Don’t make them feel like they need to give you a definitive answer right away.

The goal is to have a productive conversation. Putting pressure on them could make them avoid the situation because they perceive it as too stressful. Instead, end the conversation with the intent to discuss the topic again.

“It’s never too late to start, but it’s always too late to wait” applies to more than just funding your retirement account; it’s also the best approach to take when discussing long-term care. Taking the time now to open the lines of communication will save you a lot of trouble down the road. If you wait until there is an emergency that requires you to make a serious decision, you will only contribute to the already stressful of the situation. And chances are, you will not be able to evaluate every option with the time it deserves. But, more importantly, it will take away from the quality of time you get to spend with your loved one.

Don’t wait until it’s too late to start talking about long-term care. Chances are if you’re thinking about it, your loved one is thinking about it too. They may even want to talk about it, but they don’t know where to start. Fortunately, you do. Have the conversation about long-term care with your senior loved one, today! 

Do you have any advice for someone having trouble bringing up the topic of long-term care?

Did you find something particularly helpful when you had this conversation?

Share this post to help others begin talking about long-term care.

“5 Tips For a Successful Conversation About Long-term Care,” Ashley LeVine, Amada Blog Contributor.

Amada Senior Care provides quality private care and assist with Long Term Care Insurance Management.  Call Amada Senior Care at 480-999-5250 to schedule an assessment today! Say "I saw you in SPOTLIGHT!"

Amada Senior Care ~ The Effects of Stress on Older Adults

When your body senses danger, your brain sends signals directing your muscles to tighten and your adrenal glands to release stress hormones. Stress hormones, such as adrenaline and cortisol, force your breath to quicken, blood pressure to rise, and senses to sharpen. These physiological changes speed up your reaction time, increase your strength, improve your stamina, and enhance your focus. This reaction is referred to as the stress response, and it’s entirely normal and necessary for survival. Once your brain accepts you are not in danger, your body returns to its normal pre-stressed state. Chronic stress, on the other hand, is harmful to your health and can be particularly hazardous for older adults. Here is what you need to know about stress in older adults.

The Effects of Stress On Older Adults

Although it’s difficult to determine the extent to which chronic stress affects the health of older adults, there is undoubtedly a correlation. Here are the few ways seniors are affected by stress.

Lowered Immune System

You’ve likely experienced a time in your life where you were stressed out and became sick. Your situation only became more stressful when you had to put everything you were stressed about on hold to allow yourself to recover. What you may not realize is that “being stressed” is likely the reason you got sick. Stress is known to suppress the immune system, making you more susceptible to illness.

Furthermore, older adults are already more susceptible to illness due to the age-related suppression of their immune system. Combined, these factors make it easier for older adults to get sick and make the recovery process take longer. As a result, stress makes it far more difficult for older adults to detect and fight disease.

Heart Problems

Stress can flood your body with adrenaline, which raises your blood pressure and heart rate. But the relationship between stress and heart disease extends far beyond quantifiable factors. Stress can cause seniors to look for relief in activities such as excessive drinking, overeating, and drug use. Each of these activities can damage arteries, blood vessels, and increase your risk for heart disease.

Vision and Hearing Loss

Long-term adrenaline production can constrict blood vessels, leading to a temporary decrease in hearing and vision.

Digestive Issues

Stress can literally make you feel sick to your stomach. This sick feeling occurs when stress activates the “fight or flight” response in your central nervous system. The central nervous system can shut down blood flow, causing contractions of your digestive muscles, and a decrease in the secretions necessary for digestion. Chronic or severe stress can lead to serious digestive problems such as irritable bowel syndrome and ulcers.

Dental Issues

It is common for dental issues to increase with age, making seniors more susceptible to fractures and cavities. Stress can contribute to these dental problems when they stressfully clench their jaw throughout the day and unintentionally grind their teeth.

Common Stressors For Older Adults

Stressors often change as you age. Here are some of the most common stressors experienced by older adults.

Changes in Health or Physical Ability

Health can be a huge stressor for aging adults.

• Deteriorating health. 
• Increased dependence on others.
• Healthcare costs.
• Losing energy. Losing energy can be frustrating for seniors, as they are forced to slow down their lives.
• Losing the ability to do their favorite things. 

Loneliness and Isolation

Loneliness and isolation are two very common stressors for aging adults. Here are a few examples of why seniors are particularly susceptible to loneliness and isolation.

• Losing a spouse. The loss of a spouse due to death or divorce is common among older adults.
• Losing family members, friends, or pets. Many seniors feel lonely after they lose a family member, friend, or pet. Regardless of whether the loss was the result of a death, relocation, or conflict, the event can cause seniors to isolate themselves, increasing their feelings of loneliness.

Lack of Purpose

Older adults who lack feeling a sense of purpose are more susceptible to stress and its harmful effects. Here are a few scenarios where a senior may feel a question their sense of purpose.

• Retiring. Adults who define themselves by their by their career often lose their sense of purpose when they retire.
• Losing the feeling of being needed. 
• Losing a position in your community. 

Loss of Independence

Losing independence can trigger a stress response. Here are a few reasons why a senior may feel their independence is threatened.

• Losing the ability to drive safely. Many seniors experience a decrease in their mobility, causing them to lose their driver’s license.
• Losing the ability to live alone. Seniors with disabilities often lose their ability to live alone, forcing them to become dependent.
• Losing control over daily routine. A decrease in mobility can force seniors to depend on others for help with the activities of daily living.
• Lacking transportation services. Seniors with limited options for transportation can make it difficult for seniors to do things on their own.
• Decreasing financial independence. Losing the ability to manage their own money can challenge a seniors sense of independence.
• Increasing healthcare costs. An increase in healthcare costs can force seniors to become financially dependent.

Recognizing the Signs and Symptoms of Stress in Older Adults

• Feeling tired
• Sleeplessness
• Irritability
• Unnecessary worrying
• Headaches and other pains
• Negative feelings or attitude
• Feeling out of control
• Poor concentration
• Frequent crying
• Constipation or diarrhea
• Shortness of breath

If you or a loved one experience any of these symptoms, it is important to be proactive about finding ways to manage your stress before the damage becomes irreversible.

5 Tips For Managing Stress

Here are a few stress reduction techniques.

1. Take care of yourself by exercising regularly and eating a well-balanced diet.
2. Get involved in community events.
3. Volunteer for a cause you care about.
4. Learn strategies to help you cope with stress such as relaxation techniques and mediation.
5. Focus on the things you can control as opposed to those you can’t.

Amada Senior Care provides quality private care and assist with Long Term Care Insurance Management.  Call Amada Senior Care at 480-999-5250 to schedule an assessment today!

Visiting Angels Seeking Full Time Operations Manager in North Scottsdale & Community Liaisons

Visiting Angels of Scottsdale is looking to add more amazing talent to our dream team!!!

Our current Operations Manager has been promoted and therefore we have an opening for an Operations Manager in North Scottsdale!

I am also looking dynamic, outgoing and compassionate
Community Liaisons.
We have an opening for a Community Liaison in Scottsdale and a second opening for a Community Liaison in Sun City!
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Navigating Long-Term Care Insurance for your Parents

Submitted by Kimberly Perkins-Akers with Amada Senior Care

When you first noticed that your parent’s age was limiting them, what questions came to mind? Did you struggle to accept the reality of their aging or worry about their wellbeing? Did you wonder what preparations were in place for their needs?

Besides the questions you may have asked yourself, there is one question you must ask your aging parent: “Do you have a long-term care insurance policy?”

After a health crisis, anyone may find they need long-term care. But since senior citizens especially are at a higher risk for debilitating health problems, they are more likely to need it.

Long-term care provides assistance with activities of daily living, or ADLs. These include bathing, dressing, meal preparation, medication reminders, housekeeping, shopping, toileting and other non-medical assistance. In the future, forecasts say that 70% of people over the age of 65 will need long-term care at some point in their lifetime. According to the American Association for Long-Term Care Insurance, 30%, or 1.5 million people of the older population already have substantial long-term care needs.

The cost of long-term care is rising. Imagine what you believe your parent would pay for a room in a nursing home. In a 2015 survey, Genworth reported that a private nursing home room, which is the priciest option for care, now costs $92,378 annually. This is a 19% increase since 2011.

How should your elderly parent pay for the monumental cost of long-term care? If you are fortunate, your parent may already have the answer to that question. He or she might have a long-term care insurance policy. Long-term care insurance (LTCI) is a valuable tool to protect assets and finance long-term care. If your loved one has purchased a policy, you may be reading this article to find out how to navigate it with them. If they do not have a policy yet, this article will help you navigate LTCI for your parent nevertheless.

Preparation

Long-term care insurance is an investment to consider before it is needed. Without LTCI, long-term care’s costly expenses are paid using either Medicaid (if you qualify for it) or out-of-pocket savings (if you can afford it). The middle class is in limbo between having too much wealth to qualify for Medicaid and too little to afford long-term care on their own. Long-term care insurance is meant to be a solution for them.

If your parent is in good health, between the ages of 50 and 65, and able to make decisions about paying for long-term care before they actually need it, it is time to shop for an LTCI policy. Some children of adults this age may be too young to take the lead in their parent’s financial matters. Yet at this time, your parent is in good shape to secure their policy because insurers will base costs on:

• Type of benefits desired
• Health
• Family History
• Age
• Gender

If your parent is in poor health, around or above the age of 65 and in need of long-term care, their situation can fork into two directions.

If your parent does not have long-term care insurance, they may deplete their personal savings or depend on family to pay for or provide care. For seniors who have exhausted these options whose needs still aren’t met, they may have to resort to Medicaid; a health insurance option for low-income seniors.

If your parent has a long-term care insurance policy, funding for care is within reach. Your parent may not remember that they have LTCI. So ask them the crucial question, “Do you have a long-term care insurance policy?” This is an important starting point for the process ahead.

The Health Crisis

The unfortunate turn of events that typically prompts people to need long-term care is a health crisis. A health crisis can occur at any age and to a person in any state of health. Accidents and terminal illnesses are just a few health crises that handicap healthy people for the rest of their lives. Senior citizens are at risk for these crises in addition to common debilitating ailments, such as cognitive decline, cardiovascular disease, respiratory disease, falls, influenza, pneumonia and Alzheimer’s disease.

In the midst of fretting over the health status of your parent while they are treated in the hospital for these common health problems, it may be impossible for you to even consider thinking about what lies ahead after discharge. But following successful treatment of a serious health problem, senior citizens undergo dramatic changes in their lifestyles when they go home. They may have a sudden need for constant, dependable care. To continue the progress of your parent’s health, there must be a way to pay for it.

Families hope to feel relief after their elderly loved one’s discharge from a hospital. However, if they suddenly find themselves short of the resources to provide care for the senior’s needs at home, stress compounds on top of the health crisis. If your parent has an LTCI policy, this is where it brings you a solution.

After the health crisis, a senior with an LTCI policy can only activate their policy as soon as they qualify for care. Observe your parent to determine whether they are:

• Incontinent
• Cognitively impaired
• Unable to bathe, dress or eat
• Unable to move on their own
• Unable to toilet independently
• 
  

These are just a few signs for your parent to activate their LTCI policy, with your help.

Activating the Policy

There are several things for you and your parent to know when activating their LTCI policy. Know how long the elimination period is for the policy. The elimination period is essentially a time-based deductible where you are responsible for paying the full portion until coverage begins. Elimination periods can range from 0-100 days. If you were preoccupied with your parent’s health treatment, this detail may have escaped you. It is frustrating to suddenly need immediate long-term care after a health crisis, only to find that you have to wait for your LTCI policy to kick in its coverage. Knowing the elimination period ahead of time not only informs your parent of what policies to choose in the first place, it also cues you to prepare out-of-pocket resources for care during its time span.

Know the policy’s maximum daily benefit and maximum lifetime benefit. The maximum daily benefit is the amount a policy will reimburse for each day of long-term care. Look out for inflation riders on the maximum daily benefit, which can significantly increase it over time.

The maximum lifetime benefit is the total amount of time or money up to which benefits will be paid. Policies can state the maximum lifetime benefit in either days or dollars. Know which one your parent’s plan uses. Also look out for a Restoration of Benefit, which allows your parent to restore benefits if they are not fully maximized.

Although your parent has already chosen what benefits to receive if they’ve already purchased a long-term care insurance policy, it helps you to know what specific benefits their plan covers. The Genworth 2015 Cost of Care Surveyoutlines all types of long-term care that seniors can get, as well as their costs. Research the types of care covered by your parent’s plan and be assertive in commissioning the best companies to provide them. If your parent is like most American senior citizens today, they may prefer long-term care at home. Securing this care entails knowing the coverage the LTCI policy will afford, what services to go to for the care and monitoring the professionals who come to your parent’s aid.

Knowing all of this, you are ready to initiate the activation of your parent’s LTCI policy. These are things for you to do:

• Call your parent’s insurer and request a claim packet.
• Fill out the claim form and send it in.
• Make sure to list the information of the company providing care and their tax ID.
• Check to see if the policy requires a doctor to fill out a form documenting your need for care.
• Check to see if your parent needs an assessment from a registered nurse (RN).

Maximizing Benefits

Once the claim is approved, you want your parent’s benefits to be maximized under the reimbursement they receive. Achieving this takes constant attention to detail and monitoring invoices and notes your insurer needs to keep the claim active. Ensure that each invoice you receive from providers, like caregiver agencies, is submitted to the insurer. Each invoice must have notes documenting that assistance with your parent’s ADLs is provided each day.

Aside from all the work that goes into purchasing and activating it, long-term care insurance is sometimes disappointing when the grant of coverage is unpredictable. What if your parent never qualifies? What if the claim is not approved? What if it is, but the insurer decides your parent no longer qualifies later on and cancels it?

Your Trusted LTCI Partner

You and the rest of the children who try to navigate long-term care insurance for their aging parents are not alone. Amada Senior Care is the one-stop shop for long-term care insurance advocacy. Amada Senior Care locations across the U.S. provide a Concierge LTC Resource Center of experts who help policyholders understand and verify their long-term care insurance benefits. Our senior care advisors will guide you through the process of reviewing and filing a claim so that you can start receiving your benefits as soon as possible. Our advocates will:

• Identify and analyze the requirements of your policy, including elimination periods, daily maximum, lifetime benefits and coverage.
• Assist policyholders in completing the necessary forms to file a claim.
• Bill the LTCI carrier directly at policyholder’s request.
• Aid in the responsibilities of payroll taxes, benefits, scheduling, bonding, workers’ compensation and general and professional liability insurance.

Amada Senior Care has established relationships with multiple LTCI carriers and third-party administrators to make the claims process easier. The Concierge LTC Resource Center will not only assist you or your loved one with the details of your policy but will also coordinate and deliver care – providing you with the peace of mind and the time to share happy, healthy wellbeing with your elderly parent.

Amada Senior Care provides quality private care and assist with Long Term Care Insurance Management.  Call Amada Senior Care at 480-999-5250 to schedule an assessment today!

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